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<title>your sweetly bitter poison by takunism (weareinnoir)</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28040436">your sweetly bitter poison</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/weareinnoir/pseuds/takunism'>takunism (weareinnoir)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>JO1 (Japan Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drabble, Jealousy, M/M, Making Out, Valentine's Day, no beta we die like men, the title is so emo but it's really just. from a bad obscure jpop song</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 00:28:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>934</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28040436</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/weareinnoir/pseuds/takunism</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It's nothing fancy – it wasn't too expensive and, well, it's not homemade, and if you're really serious about someone, you make the chocolate yourself, right?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kawanishi Takumi/Kawashiri Ren, a hint of tomosho for flavor</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>your sweetly bitter poison</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There comes a point, Ren's pretty sure, where all love becomes selfless – where you genuinely think you'll be fine as long as the other person is happy, even if that happiness isn't with you. He's heard lyrics in songs that imply that, seen it happen in movies – he's pretty sure that's how Sho feels about Tomoaki, even, if the way their leader gazes at his Orbit teasers is any indication.</p><p>Whatever Ren feels for Takumi (he's hesitant to call it love – he's hesitant to call it anything, as if refusing to give a voice to his feelings will make them disappear) isn't quite there yet.</p><p>It's not like he hasn't tried to quell the jealousy that inevitably sparks when Takumi plays with Keigo or Junki – they're all adults, they can make their own choices, Ren has negative right to judge, and he knows that. But god, what he would give to be the one Takumi's snuggling up against instead. It's awful and selfish and immature of Ren to even think that, and he knows that, too. He isn't even sure that Takumi likes guys – fuck, Ren wasn't sure himself if he was into guys, before Shosei had caught him staring at a certain B-class trainee with pink hair and proceeded to tease him mercilessly about it. He shouldn't be jealous – there's probably nothing to be jealous of.</p><p>It still flares up in Ren's lungs – it's the feeling he gets when he watches Takumi on stage, but twisted and negative.</p><p>But, well, at least they're hanging out this Valentine's day – they'd planned "the second Friday in February" for a movie night ("You've never seen John Wick? Ren-kun, it's 2020!") long before realizing that, yeah, that Friday just so happened to be a holiday dedicated to chocolate, commercialism, and love. Ren's cleaned his apartment up some, ordered take out (burgers, naturally, even though they're technically supposed to be dieting) and... well, yeah, he's bought chocolate.</p><p>It's nothing fancy – it wasn't too expensive and, well, it's not homemade, and if you're really serious about someone, you make the chocolate yourself, right? It's not like Ren is actually going to give Takumi the chocolate, anyway – he's probably going to drink his brains out and just eat it himself the next time he's got a day off, so he hides the red, heart-shaped box in his fridge and tries his best to forget about it.</p><hr/><p>"So who's the chocolate for, Ren-kun?" Takumi asks, half an hour into John Wick: Chapter Two, his voice bright and curious, as he returns to Ren's couch with another beer in his hand.</p><p>Ren nearly spits out his burger. "Whff chcl – I mean, what chocolate?" he replies, when he's mildly coherent.</p><p>"In your fridge," Takumi says, like it's obvious. (It is obvious. Fuck, Ren thinks.) "Bright red box with a bow – who were you going to give it to?"</p><p>"...Uh, I just kind of bought it," Ren replies, after too long of a pause – it's a lie, and such an obvious lie that Ren cringes. "I wasn't – I mean, you can just buy chocolate –"</p><p>"You don't seem too sure," Takumi says – even the pout on his face is adorable, and man, is Ren ever whipped.</p><p>"I just kind of bought it," Ren repeats weakly. "I just..."</p><p>"It's fine if you don't want to tell me," Takumi says, voice much softer than it has been. "You're kind of a private person, right, Ren-kun? I get the same way sometimes. But you don't have to lie."</p><p>Huh, Ren thinks – so that's what a heart breaking feels like.</p><p>He takes a deep breath and shakes his head. "You're right. So, um, Takumi, those chocolates are for you." Ren then turns his head back to the screen – somehow, watching Keanu Reeves destroy a bunch of people using only a pencil is easier to watch than whatever Takumi's reaction to Ren's confession is.</p><p>That's probably why Ren doesn't notice Takumi leaving, grabbing the box, and coming back to the living room until the younger male sits next to Ren, closer than he had before. "Ren-kun, open your mouth."</p><p>Ren's so surprised – at Takumi's sudden closeness, at the fact that he'd grabbed the chocolates, all of it – that his mouth opens anyway; he has no time to react to Takumi shoving a chocolate into his mouth until the caramel center is already melting on his tongue. "I know you like sweets, so we should share," Takumi continues, voice soft – Ren turns his head to face Takumi, so that he can ask what the hell he's doing – but he doesn't get the chance.</p><p>The kiss is messy – it really is all tongue and teeth and Ren is so surprised that he grips tightly on Takumi's thigh, just to keep himself balanced, to remind him that yes, this is actually happening, even as Takumi reaches up a hand to run his fingers through Ren's hair – and lasts for far longer than Ren was expecting; the movie's long forgotten, though Ren can faintly tell that at least one scene change has happened before Takumi finally pulls away, lips red and puffy.</p><p>Ren swallows thickly. "What the fuck," he whispers, heart pounding so fast in his chest that he's pretty sure this is where he's going to die.</p><p>"Caramel," Takumi says, simply. He's smirking. He has Ren wrapped snugly around his finger, and he knows it. "Want another one?"</p><p>Ren pauses the movie, first, before he nods – all of a sudden, he has a Valentine's day to celebrate, and an entire box of chocolate to go through with the cutest guy he's ever seen.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this... is my least favorite of these drabbles lmao, originally posted on write.as earlier this year, reposting for consistency in my masterlist</p><p>title and concept from akb48 team b's kuchi utsushi no chocolate</p><p>follow me on twitter for more writing: @noir_fics</p></blockquote></div></div>
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